Giving up on toddler's eating habits...

Today I've decided that I'm giving up on finding ways to feed N veggies. I borrowed Mel's Sneaky Chef book and made what I thought would be great patties filled with veggies that he'll eat.

Nope- he didn't eat any and just started throwing them away.

Remembering the time I laboured early in the morning to make them, to prepare the veggies and puree them, when I could have just worked on my website and maybe perhaps, I would have been on time to have it done by next week so I can start marketing myself and actually make money, well...that is nowhere near finished right now - this makes me very angry.

So today is the clincher for me. After lunch, N set me in such a bad mood that I just took him off the chair, and took him straight to his nap time. Strangely enough, he didn't struggle nor cry.

Today, I decided that I will NOT make any more special meals for N. He will eat whatever is prepared for that night and if he doesn't, then he starves himself.

This all sounds too militaristic and perhaps insensitive but I've reached my breaking point. I'm the boss after all and not the tot. He will have to develop good eating habits and learn to follow the rules.

Thanks for listening.

Reading: How the pill changed the world

Just read an interesting article about How the Pill changed the world.
We're all of that age in our group. The starting to run out of time, worry about fertility, I don't want to be breastfeeding at 44 years old group.

Any thoughts on this?

You know when you have a toddler when....

...you are the enemy when they eat and the fork is their best friend.

...they learn to pitch their food across the table

...they re-decorate your flooring to test the law of gravity

...they tell you it's time to wash your sweater as they wipe their hands clean off it

...they tell you when it's time to clean your bathroom by spilling water OVER the bathtub or spraying it on your pants

...they confuse you by pointing at the shower and getting upset if you don't turn it on.

..they get upset if you pull them out of their bath.

...they love washing their hands because they like bringing their step stool and gathering all your toiletries into the sink full of water.

...they talk theatrically with their hands out like a politician and look at you as if waiting for an answer

...they say NO, ALL THE TIME, even when they mean yes.. and they are not even adults in relationships yet.

...you can't shop with them unless you make them walk around the mall or the grocery store and play with price tags or break something that you might be charged to pay for.

...they only eat certain foods they think are 'cool' to eat today

...they behave well at daycare making you look like a paranoid parent.

...they try to fit their fat little toes in your boots or slippers and get upset if you take them away

...you take the slippers away, they find them and bite them instead... like a poor neglected pet.

...they point and laugh at the little boobies that once fed their little tummies when they see them

...they learn to turn the TV and DVD player on and off and play with any remote at your place or someone else's

...they learn to use your cellphone as a drool catcher and a toy at the same time

...they pretend to be Oscar contenders for the drama queen/king award.

...they understand what you are saying even if you don't understand them

...they throw you butterfly kisses and give you wet kisses

...they hug you after you play hide-and-seek with them

...they wave 'bye-bye' as you leave the room while you wish them good night.

...they get cuter and cuter in your eyes and it's hard to resist their requests

...they feel so comfortable around you that they shed all the "mister/miss perfect routine' around you

...they call you in the morning as they wake up and they yell 'mama? mama?'. :)

...they flash you a big smile as you pick them up at daycare.. but they don't want to leave. :P

Moms, feel free to add to this list.. ;)

Tiny Tot Temper Tantrums

My husband says to me a few weeks ago "What happened to our easy going baby?"

It's over. She's discovered pouting, fake cries and the now infamous temper tantrums! Throwing herself on the floor. Stomping around the living room yelling "NO NO NO!". What triggered it this time you ask?....

Her loving dad caved in to her cheese request but made the mistake of offering a cheese stick instead of a Babybel cheese! That was our house this morning.

She never says yes. Sometimes she will nod her head in affirmation but godforbid she says the word! "NO" however is said repeatedly. Sometimes with a wagging finger.

Some say "Ignore them" when they throw a tantrum. Don't react, show them that it doesn't give them what they want, keep speaking to them in a gentle manner about something else". Tried this yesterday. Result: 20 minutes straight of yelling and crying. There were some intermittent moments where she picked herself up off the floor to go ride her horse but all while crying and screaming then back to the floor. Seriously kid? GIVE IT UP!!

I was at such a loss having tried different techniques that as she was screaming I sat at my computer and ordered 2 toddler parenting books from Amazon. I'm now anxiously awaiting them. How sad is that?

Here's the kicker: she's an angel at daycare.

What did happen to my easy going baby???

S - Lean on me

Having just moved with husband and 16 month-old across three time zones, I'm thinking a lot these days about what elements I want to build into our new life and particularly into my new life as a stay-at-home mom in a new city. Since I lived here as a teenager and my parents are still here, we have family and good friends in town, which will be wonderful. However, most of those people work during the week, so I will have Monday to Friday to fill up. I suppose I had to do that in Montreal, too, but it happened more gradually as I moved out of the fog of the newborn phase and was more easily able to get out of the house, so it (that aspect of it, anyway) didn't feel as daunting at the time. This time, I have a very active little person on my hands who needs stimulation and interaction with other toddlers/children, and quite frankly I often find myself frazzled and frustrated at the end of a full day spent at home by myself with little A.

I've started a little list of activities that little A and I can partake in here. And I have a friend who's home with her 2.5 year old daughter; I hope that the four of us will see each other regularly. I was feeling pretty good about those leads when the above-mentioned friend asked me how I deal with the isolation of being a SAHM. Wow.... thud. That brought me down to earth fast! It can be terribly isolating staying at home with a little person all week... but I didn't experienced it that way, not much anyway, because of the strong support network I wove for myself in our old neighbourhood. Because of my fellow yoga zen moms!

Then today I read a post on a blog I have loved for a long time, in which the writer, a new mom to her second son, describes how vital to her mental health it can be reach out when she's feeling vulnerable. About how it can be so hard to do, but it can do so much good. I wanted to share the post here, because it rings true to me and I feel it's important for us to remember to reach out and lean on each other when the going gets rough, whether you're a mom who works at home or outside the home.

In building this new life of ours, I will need to think of activities, yes. But additionally and arguably more importantly, I will need to seek out connections with people to whom I can turn in my more challenging moments, to whom I can show my vulnerability. I write this and I think, "of course," because it's those kinds of connections that kept me afloat through those difficult early months and beyond.

Thank goodness for the Internet and all the ways I can stay in touch with the people I left behind when we left Montreal. Thank goodness for this new forum for sharing with each other. I feel lucky to be able to do a little leaning on your virtual shoulders, and to be here for you, even as I start to weave a new network for myself way out West.

Has motherhood changed the way you connect with friends, or your need to reach out?

When your toddler goes from eating everything to eating one thing...

Imagine eating pasta every night. I think if I ate pasta everyday, I would just get sick of it, really. Well, not for my 17-month old. He seems to just want to eat pasta. Occasionally, he would eat little pieces of protein-rich food here and there but veggies are out of the question. I know I shouldn't worry too much and that one day, he will outgrow this habit (I hope!) but trying to come up with meals for N is such a challenge and I worry that he may not be getting good nutrition for his age. When we go out to see the grandparents, I have to bring some pasta as back-up because they make 'real food' for adults and they don't bother asking me what N likes to eat. Of course, that's another issue altogether for another blog. My mom pretty much does a good job of cooking something for him whenever we are over and she is quite talented in putting stuff in his mouth.

N's fave food pretty much sums up to: pasta, pomegranates, raspberries and mangoes. I've sneaked in veggies in the pasta sauce and tried different pasta shapes but that's about as creative as I can get with pasta dinner!

I was thinking last night while we were having dinner, that perhaps N would prefer to eat with us. If he eats with adults eating, he seems to eat more but during the week, we prefer to put him to bed first before we eat our dinner.. a bit more relaxing that way.

So how are your tots taking up eating these days?

C.

H - To drug one's child or not? That is the question....

After a hellish, and I mean hellish, flight to the UK and the return flight I think I will give F gravol on our next trip. I have come to this decision via a strong disagreement with this traveling ritual of some parents. But having done too many awful trips with little miss energiser bunny I am coming round to another way of thinking. So tell me what you think please.

Here's my rationale:
Most often on flights F should be sleeping anyway for some of the time.
She gets so unbelievably overtired she cannot handle going to sleep.
She loses all ability to use her coping mechanisms.
She is totally overwrought in a way only sleep can cure.

Here's a discussion of interest

So I think I'll discuss it with her doctor, but let me know your thoughts.
H