Rethinking praise

I just read this article on the risks of overusing praise and lines like "good job" with our kids. This is definitely food for thought for me. I'm sure if I counted the number of times in a day that I say "good job" to little a., I would quickly run out of fingers. What are your thoughts on this - is praise something you're wary of, and if so, have you replaced it with some other kind of reaction?

S - On the other hand...

I've found this week trying week because, well, I have a 16 month old. A 16 month old who has a finely tuned sense of what she does and does not want. So I've been dealing with a lot of NOs and a generous dose of back-arching and banshee-like screaming when I attempt to do such offensive things as put little a. into her stroller or high chair. I've been feeling overwhelmed and a little undone by these new behaviours and had been mentally putting together a post to that effect over the last few days - at best a cry for help, but more likely a letter of complaint.

But then, today, I had a moment of pure joy with little a. that helped me to remember some of the wonderful things about her growing more and more into a little person with her own sense of self. It's a little thing that warms my heart: when she expresses some sort of wish and I understand it and ask "Do you want an orange?" (for example), her face lights up into the hugest smile and she nods her head dramatically. It's a look that transcends the request at hand to reveal the pride she feels at being understood. And in turn it leaves me with the amazing feeling of really communicating with my daughter.

Through this realization, I was able to turn my focus from what's been bringing me down to reveling in something good. And I want to ask you, what is going on with your little ones these days that brings a smile to your face? Oh, and while I'm here... anyone have tips on how to nix the back-arching?

J- Bitey McSwaterson

Everyday I try to get Alex to stop biting and hiting but nothing seems to sink in. I get down to his level, use short words and repeat them everytime. Not working. He hits or bites when he's overwhelmed, over excited, or frustrated. Sometimes I see it starting and I try to distract him before he starts hitting which occasionally works. My husband is starting to lose his patience with Alex and I'm just exhausted.

Does anyone have any good toddler behaviour books you can recommend?